packing

Here I sit...as I always do before a trip (or move) - contemplating the task of packing. One of my greatest weaknesses is preparing to pack. I get anxious - excited even or nervous before going on trips or moving to a new place - and therefore, I sort've shut down - I become this slow moving, packer...semi-unmotivated, and a little intimidated. Most times I end up sleeping very little - for whatever reason I have a hard time getting myself to rest, let alone to actually pack before going on trips. On occasion it frustrates me and I "hate" packing. Sometimes it annoys me and I "don't feel like packing" and other times I'm so excited "I don't even want to think about packing" -- but pack I must. (darn!)

I find it fun how the Lord confronts us in our weakness. I know for me - it's pretty comical how MUCH I've had to pack over the last 3 weeks...and if we look at the bigger picture, the last 3 years. For someone who goes a lot of places, fairly often, you'd think I'd have this whole packing thing down to a science, right? Nah. I said it was a weakness remember! I stink at packing. (really) Until of course I get in the groove of things - then I'm a 10 minute packer (extremely efficient)!!!! (IMAGINE!!) My biggest problem is the hours it takes to get me to the point in time where I actually take those 10 minutes and get the job done. What a chore it is sometimes!

I sense the Lord is preparing me, even now - for a life of packing, moving, shifting, changing, and all the while resting in Him. I've recently felt like every time I get "settled in" He uproots me again. I've moved three times so far in my less than three months of internship - and each time has been an adventure. I suppose there's nothing better - and I could not ask for more than a life of security that lays only in the moving of the Spirit - to and from - here and there - near and far. Truly my soul's been anchored in the Lord...not a room, nor a house, nor a town, nor a job, or resting place...only Him - and honestly, that's enough.

"What do I have if I don't have You Jesus...what in this life could mean anymore? You are my Rock, You are my Glory, You are the Lifter of my head..."