humph...

"What is causing the quarrels and fights among you? Don't they come from the evil desires at war within you? You want what you don't have, so you scheme and kill to get it. You are jealous of what others have, but you can't get it, so you fight and wage war to take it away from them. Yet you don't have what you want because you don't ask God for it. And even when you ask, you don't get it because your motives are all wrong --- you want only what will give you pleasure." James 4:1-4

What a great reminder of how we must daily turn to the cross and seek after the Lord in all we do...to realize that by His grace we can be provided for, healed, blessed and taught, and that when our sinful nature steps in and that rabinous desire to control* steps in, that we're in, as little michelle on Full House says, "big trouble mister"...in creeps the little sin bubbles and then before we know it, there's a huge explosion and we find ourselves upset and wondering why we don't get what we ask for from the Lord. We are not being faithful to His commands. We are not trusting Him with everything. We're saying "Okay God, I ask this of you....but oOOoooh I want what suzi-q has so much more..."and we become anxious and bitter and before we know it the good is gone. We'll do anything for that desire, even if it wrongs a dear brother or sister. We're trying to do things with Christ as our aid instead of our ONLY Hope.

Lord, help me, for I am a weak sinner, guilty of wanting to cling to control sometimes for my security. Cleanse my eyes to see the work You have done and have yet to do in my life as special and a blessing. I come to you with a humble spirit and a heartfelt plea of "please fix me..." May the desires of my heart beat with your commands and my mind be filled with visions and images of Your will and plans for me...Here am I...use me Lord, send me. Stretch me beyond all logical reasoning. Demolish my comfort zone and take captive each of my thoughts. May my mind be like Christ's. Teach me to exhibit kindness and goodness. My spirit is willing but my flesh is weak...You are good Lord!