I've found it fairly difficult to keep up 2 blogs while being overseas.
To keep in contact with me best - please follow my WORLD RACE BLOG and keep up with the many stories - as I travel with my team to 11 countries for 11 months.
http://christyzbylut.theworldrace.org
Monday, September 20, 2010
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
inspiration
What inspires you?
What touches the very depths of your heart?
Is it new life? the passing of old?
What about triumph? trials? failure?
Perhaps success? romance? love and kindness?
What about breath? life? awakening each morning?
So much is set before us that may liven our hearts
yet so often we miss it.
We trudge our way through the dance of our day,
never once caring to lift our foot from it sorry place,
never once giggling and delighting in an unexpected twirl.
We moan and groan, complain, and hope for the next day,
while the present still remains.
Our hearts are walled in with schedules, agendas, meetings,
and selfish plans...we silence the laughter...
we silence the dance...we silence the silliness and freedom...
sometimes we silence the King.
I know I made it through my day,
What a bles-sed day it was...
but I'm far too tired to spend time now with You Lord, just because.
Priorities, priorities, where are your priorities?
Does the Word gather dust while your tv glimmers and shines?
Does the Word disappear along the shelf as your photos pollute its view?
Does your prayer time shorten and shorten on behalf of that ringing tone?
A text, a message, a call for sure...from that lovely one that you adore.
"My child, my child...why won't you hear me?
Come beloved, I long to meet with you.
Stop honoring me with your mouth - while your heart is far from me.
Stop going through the motions, you mean more than that to me.
I created you with purpose...not to make it or scrape by...
I created you for excellence - come beloved don't be shy.
My plans for you are good and great, if only you will hear.
Silence those silly idol distractions, set your eyes upon this prize.
I want your heart, your life, your everything - more than I want
your habits and rituals. Come, beloved, come! Let me be your inspiration!
Let me be your life!"
(previously posted/written December 2008 -Christy L. Zbylut)
What touches the very depths of your heart?
Is it new life? the passing of old?
What about triumph? trials? failure?
Perhaps success? romance? love and kindness?
What about breath? life? awakening each morning?
So much is set before us that may liven our hearts
yet so often we miss it.
We trudge our way through the dance of our day,
never once caring to lift our foot from it sorry place,
never once giggling and delighting in an unexpected twirl.
We moan and groan, complain, and hope for the next day,
while the present still remains.
Our hearts are walled in with schedules, agendas, meetings,
and selfish plans...we silence the laughter...
we silence the dance...we silence the silliness and freedom...
sometimes we silence the King.
I know I made it through my day,
What a bles-sed day it was...
but I'm far too tired to spend time now with You Lord, just because.
Priorities, priorities, where are your priorities?
Does the Word gather dust while your tv glimmers and shines?
Does the Word disappear along the shelf as your photos pollute its view?
Does your prayer time shorten and shorten on behalf of that ringing tone?
A text, a message, a call for sure...from that lovely one that you adore.
"My child, my child...why won't you hear me?
Come beloved, I long to meet with you.
Stop honoring me with your mouth - while your heart is far from me.
Stop going through the motions, you mean more than that to me.
I created you with purpose...not to make it or scrape by...
I created you for excellence - come beloved don't be shy.
My plans for you are good and great, if only you will hear.
Silence those silly idol distractions, set your eyes upon this prize.
I want your heart, your life, your everything - more than I want
your habits and rituals. Come, beloved, come! Let me be your inspiration!
Let me be your life!"
(previously posted/written December 2008 -Christy L. Zbylut)
Thursday, June 24, 2010
living for 'the great' vs. 'the good that can work'
Sometimes in the midst of all our planning, devising, scheming, and perfection seeking - we forget to dream. We neglect opportunities to dance, laugh, smile, and sing - we forget to imagine and believe for the unknown, the unseen, the unexpected. How beautiful it is to live in anticipation of something great - how beautiful it is to live for the KINGDOM!
By the spring semester of my freshman year in college, I'd been in a serious relationship of two years...and though confusion clouded my mind - everyone around me seemed solid in their stance and opinion of what I should be doing, where I should be, and who I should be. Amidst my confusion, and lack of feelings, I willingly listened and settled. We'd talked about the present, we'd shared about the past (a little), and we'd dreamt of the future...or so I thought. The longer I remained in this relationship - the more I disappeared, and each day I struggled to figure out what was wrong with "me" and why everyone else was so happy about this when I was so numb, so trapped, so suffocated, so empty and unfulfilled. Something was missing - something had lost its spark - something was at the end of its rope.
It's a scary thing to know you've been with someone for 2 years and don't love them like everyone says you should. It's scary to receive advice that makes you feel more wrong and confused about not having feelings. It's scary to lose yourself in the shadow of someone else. It's scary to settle and to disappear - but more terrifying than all this, is to finally see yourself and who you've become - simply because you settled - and let someone other than God truly define you - You let someone else's dreams and plans take ahold of your heart and block out the plans you were truly PURPOSED for, and knit together with.
I was reminded this week of a tough life lesson I will never forget - and will always treasure. It's a lesson that has challenged me, humbled me, molded me, led me, and from time to time...annoyed me.
I'll never forget that crisp late-winter day as the bus rolled into the campus center parking lot. Luggage crew was busy unloading as everyone else waited patiently on the bus. We'd just finished up a 10 day Chorale tour - leading worship at various venues across the east coast. I'd spent the week prior to tour fasting and praying with my prayer-partner. Her dedication and support pushed me to press through and helped me peel the scales from my eyes that had previously blinded me to the choice I was facing ahead. As my turn approached to get off the bus, I saw him - and a sickening nausea flooded my stomach. The very sight of him made me want to run and throw up - but my stubbornness to nip this in the bud pushed me on. Grabbing my luggage, I avoided his usual greetings, and headed toward my dorm room. The familiar voice of a sister sounded across campus..."Christy!!!!!!!!" I turned around and saw my dear sister Amy. Dropping everything in my arms I ran to her and received a giant hug.
It hit me..."woah...this is definitely over." You don't date someone for two years and forget about them. You don't date someone for two years and feel sick to see them. I did...and I knew something had to change. In my time away I'd been reminded of who Christy is, and was challenged to DREAM again. I'd begun to hear God's voice clearly again, and my heart heard Him whispering that there was more, more, more...greater depths to explore with Him....great adventure awaiting.
Not sure how to handle this situation...I dropped to my knees and began to pray.
"Lord, yes or no! please help me! I don't know what to do." Silence.
"Lord, seriously, please...just show me what to do!" Silence.
"Okay Lord, all I want to know is am I making the right decision?" ---
"Christy you can have this and it'll be good, and it can work - OR you can have these things I've been showing you, and it can be great." "Well Lord, I want the great!" I stuttered. - "Then you know what to do..." Silence.
I followed through - ended the relationship within the hour and was flooded with a freedom I didn't know I was missing out on. I've grown up a lot in the last 3 1/2 years --- and it hasn't always been easy --- and though the waiting has been rough at times, and I've been tempted to go searching for something that can "work" just to satisfy my desires for what I think is great - God's never left me hanging or without. He always keeps His promises - and has been teaching and molding my heart in such a bizarre, gentle way, that I've come to recognize that living for the great isn't wrapped up in achievements, worldly wealth, or even my expectations of what it should look like - living for the great is giving up my right to selfishly chase my own ambitions - and to seek first the Kingdom of God. It's understanding and breathing the truth that I am His beloved - He is mine - and His plans for me are GOOD, and PURPOSED, they are anointed and blessed, timely, and GREAT - infinitely and exceedingly above and beyond what I could ever begin to ask or imagine.
This is how I want my life to be in all things - always....living for the GREAT, waiting on the Lord, and trusting Him that no matter what curves, bumps, and twists I'll encounter - He's right there holding my hand - and walking with me into the destiny He created for me - the great. I don't want something that is simply good and can work. I want ALL God has for me. It is the cry of my heart to know Him deeper every day. Since I made the choice to pursue 'the great' - I've been blessed, provided for, and blown away in ways I never imagined possible. I've seen places, made friends, and experienced God in ways I wouldn't have, if I chose my own way or settled for something 'good that could work'.
I delight in knowing without a shadow of doubt, that the World Race is another aspect of the greatness He promised me I'd encounter and be a part of years ago...Here's to another year of greatness and the unexpected!!!!! If you'd journey with me...it'd be an honor!
By the spring semester of my freshman year in college, I'd been in a serious relationship of two years...and though confusion clouded my mind - everyone around me seemed solid in their stance and opinion of what I should be doing, where I should be, and who I should be. Amidst my confusion, and lack of feelings, I willingly listened and settled. We'd talked about the present, we'd shared about the past (a little), and we'd dreamt of the future...or so I thought. The longer I remained in this relationship - the more I disappeared, and each day I struggled to figure out what was wrong with "me" and why everyone else was so happy about this when I was so numb, so trapped, so suffocated, so empty and unfulfilled. Something was missing - something had lost its spark - something was at the end of its rope.
It's a scary thing to know you've been with someone for 2 years and don't love them like everyone says you should. It's scary to receive advice that makes you feel more wrong and confused about not having feelings. It's scary to lose yourself in the shadow of someone else. It's scary to settle and to disappear - but more terrifying than all this, is to finally see yourself and who you've become - simply because you settled - and let someone other than God truly define you - You let someone else's dreams and plans take ahold of your heart and block out the plans you were truly PURPOSED for, and knit together with.
I was reminded this week of a tough life lesson I will never forget - and will always treasure. It's a lesson that has challenged me, humbled me, molded me, led me, and from time to time...annoyed me.
I'll never forget that crisp late-winter day as the bus rolled into the campus center parking lot. Luggage crew was busy unloading as everyone else waited patiently on the bus. We'd just finished up a 10 day Chorale tour - leading worship at various venues across the east coast. I'd spent the week prior to tour fasting and praying with my prayer-partner. Her dedication and support pushed me to press through and helped me peel the scales from my eyes that had previously blinded me to the choice I was facing ahead. As my turn approached to get off the bus, I saw him - and a sickening nausea flooded my stomach. The very sight of him made me want to run and throw up - but my stubbornness to nip this in the bud pushed me on. Grabbing my luggage, I avoided his usual greetings, and headed toward my dorm room. The familiar voice of a sister sounded across campus..."Christy!!!!!!!!" I turned around and saw my dear sister Amy. Dropping everything in my arms I ran to her and received a giant hug.
It hit me..."woah...this is definitely over." You don't date someone for two years and forget about them. You don't date someone for two years and feel sick to see them. I did...and I knew something had to change. In my time away I'd been reminded of who Christy is, and was challenged to DREAM again. I'd begun to hear God's voice clearly again, and my heart heard Him whispering that there was more, more, more...greater depths to explore with Him....great adventure awaiting.
Not sure how to handle this situation...I dropped to my knees and began to pray.
"Lord, yes or no! please help me! I don't know what to do." Silence.
"Lord, seriously, please...just show me what to do!" Silence.
"Okay Lord, all I want to know is am I making the right decision?" ---
"Christy you can have this and it'll be good, and it can work - OR you can have these things I've been showing you, and it can be great." "Well Lord, I want the great!" I stuttered. - "Then you know what to do..." Silence.
I followed through - ended the relationship within the hour and was flooded with a freedom I didn't know I was missing out on. I've grown up a lot in the last 3 1/2 years --- and it hasn't always been easy --- and though the waiting has been rough at times, and I've been tempted to go searching for something that can "work" just to satisfy my desires for what I think is great - God's never left me hanging or without. He always keeps His promises - and has been teaching and molding my heart in such a bizarre, gentle way, that I've come to recognize that living for the great isn't wrapped up in achievements, worldly wealth, or even my expectations of what it should look like - living for the great is giving up my right to selfishly chase my own ambitions - and to seek first the Kingdom of God. It's understanding and breathing the truth that I am His beloved - He is mine - and His plans for me are GOOD, and PURPOSED, they are anointed and blessed, timely, and GREAT - infinitely and exceedingly above and beyond what I could ever begin to ask or imagine.
This is how I want my life to be in all things - always....living for the GREAT, waiting on the Lord, and trusting Him that no matter what curves, bumps, and twists I'll encounter - He's right there holding my hand - and walking with me into the destiny He created for me - the great. I don't want something that is simply good and can work. I want ALL God has for me. It is the cry of my heart to know Him deeper every day. Since I made the choice to pursue 'the great' - I've been blessed, provided for, and blown away in ways I never imagined possible. I've seen places, made friends, and experienced God in ways I wouldn't have, if I chose my own way or settled for something 'good that could work'.
I delight in knowing without a shadow of doubt, that the World Race is another aspect of the greatness He promised me I'd encounter and be a part of years ago...Here's to another year of greatness and the unexpected!!!!! If you'd journey with me...it'd be an honor!
Saturday, June 05, 2010
When in Macon...
After training camp I hitched a drive south with some WR sisters to the Macon area. After spending 6 months during internship living in this area, I was blown away at how quickly and lovingly these people welcomed me back into their lives. I had the privilege of attending HOG (the weekly young adult gathering downtown with fellow college students), as well as visiting Morningside (the assisted living facility I volunteered at), and Camp Pathway (where I worked for two months building relationships with many kiddos). I LOVED IT! I'm so thankful God allowed me an opportunity to visit with this beautiful network of brothers & sisters in the south.
*Camp Pathway staff from last year...*
Katherine memorized all 11 countries I'll be traveling to + recited them daily.
All the camp kiddos surrounding me with love and prayer as I head out!
*Camp Pathway staff from last year...*
Katherine memorized all 11 countries I'll be traveling to + recited them daily.
All the camp kiddos surrounding me with love and prayer as I head out!
a preview of WR training camp
The amazing P-squad --- my beautiful family with 74 members!
Tent-ville (a glimpse) from training camp.
Dance party in the parking lot, anyone? The P-squad LOVES to dance.
Team Hinds Feet in our first official outing.
The first two world racers I met at the Atlanta Airport.
The Caribbean parade in downtown Atlanta...my team was excited to find Haiti!
Team Hinds Feet at the train station
after our ATL (Ask the Lord) day of ministry.
Tent-ville (a glimpse) from training camp.
Dance party in the parking lot, anyone? The P-squad LOVES to dance.
Team Hinds Feet in our first official outing.
The first two world racers I met at the Atlanta Airport.
The Caribbean parade in downtown Atlanta...my team was excited to find Haiti!
Team Hinds Feet at the train station
after our ATL (Ask the Lord) day of ministry.
Thursday, May 20, 2010
nerves and butterflies
Training camp starts in 2 days...
tomorrow morning I drive downstate with my parents to catch my early 6:45am flight to training.
I have to admit, I'm a little nervous - but mostly excited.
You know...like first day of school butterflies...or graduation speech cotton mouth...or having to use the washroom a bajillion times before the big soccer game. I always seem to get nervous before I explode into leadership and powerful moments...with this experience in mind, I am rather excited to embark on the first part of my new journey/adventure. I continue to dream of all the things God has in store for the next year of my/my teammates lives as we travel the world - nation to nation - and share the love of Christ, while meeting the tangible needs of the people and facing issues of injustice head on. This is just the beginning...ready, set, GO!!!!!
I appreciate your prayers as I pack...and fly to Georgia.
Also, for the careful choosing of my team by those in leadership - and that this week will be a time where we can settle in, get focused, and become united in spirit and purpose as a team + a squad. To God be the glory!
tomorrow morning I drive downstate with my parents to catch my early 6:45am flight to training.
I have to admit, I'm a little nervous - but mostly excited.
You know...like first day of school butterflies...or graduation speech cotton mouth...or having to use the washroom a bajillion times before the big soccer game. I always seem to get nervous before I explode into leadership and powerful moments...with this experience in mind, I am rather excited to embark on the first part of my new journey/adventure. I continue to dream of all the things God has in store for the next year of my/my teammates lives as we travel the world - nation to nation - and share the love of Christ, while meeting the tangible needs of the people and facing issues of injustice head on. This is just the beginning...ready, set, GO!!!!!
I appreciate your prayers as I pack...and fly to Georgia.
Also, for the careful choosing of my team by those in leadership - and that this week will be a time where we can settle in, get focused, and become united in spirit and purpose as a team + a squad. To God be the glory!
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
tenting practice
I recently purchased my WORLD RACE tent
+ decided to set it up in the living room.
The experience of setting up a world race tent simply wouldn't be complete without dragging out a sleeping bag, sleeping pad, pillow...and whatever other gear I happened to have spread out in the living room.
Here's a preview of my home for the next year of my life:
+ decided to set it up in the living room.
The experience of setting up a world race tent simply wouldn't be complete without dragging out a sleeping bag, sleeping pad, pillow...and whatever other gear I happened to have spread out in the living room.
Here's a preview of my home for the next year of my life:
Saturday, May 15, 2010
graduating college
"Life is a journey during which we get to dance with people for a season."
It's been a beautiful season - of 4 years at Bethany.
I've seen the rains, and the rainbows -
been soaked and sprinkled - puddle jumped, swam, dove, and floated.
I've seen the winds, and been blown -
been refreshed, found new breath, learned to fly.
I've seen the autumns, and been captivated -
been perplexed, adventured, settled, been vibrant, and let go.
I've seen the winters, and been cold -
had the chills, frostbite, unthawing, and death.
I've seen the springs, and been refreshed -
found new life, delighted, danced, and laughed.
It's been a series of seasons - some unexpected and others prepared for. Despite the sometimes harsh winters, and thanks to the delightful springs, the illuminating and stretching autumns, I wouldn't change an ounce of my experiences at Bethany Bible College for anything but more time...
Time is precious, and though we search high and low for a pause button, it continues on - and days become weeks, which become months, which become years - and with time comes change - and with change growth - and with growth, the unexpected - the adventure + the fruit.
*Plain and simple - short n' sweet - a college graduate - that's what I be!*
It's been a beautiful season - of 4 years at Bethany.I've seen the rains, and the rainbows -
been soaked and sprinkled - puddle jumped, swam, dove, and floated.
I've seen the winds, and been blown -
been refreshed, found new breath, learned to fly.
I've seen the autumns, and been captivated -
been perplexed, adventured, settled, been vibrant, and let go.
I've seen the winters, and been cold -
had the chills, frostbite, unthawing, and death.
I've seen the springs, and been refreshed -
found new life, delighted, danced, and laughed.
It's been a series of seasons - some unexpected and others prepared for. Despite the sometimes harsh winters, and thanks to the delightful springs, the illuminating and stretching autumns, I wouldn't change an ounce of my experiences at Bethany Bible College for anything but more time...
Time is precious, and though we search high and low for a pause button, it continues on - and days become weeks, which become months, which become years - and with time comes change - and with change growth - and with growth, the unexpected - the adventure + the fruit.
*Plain and simple - short n' sweet - a college graduate - that's what I be!*
Friday, May 14, 2010
I LOVE these girls!
Friends are sometimes found in unexpected places
at unexpected times and for unexpected reasons.
Nevertheless, true friends pass the test of time,
distance, challenges, victory, trials, and blessings.
Sister-friends are unique all around -
and must be treasured for they are rarely found.
When you find a friend who will stand by your side
never forget to appreciate your time!
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
a turn of season...
In 9 days I graduate college...
- 3 exams to write
- 1 speech to get 'formally' approved
- lots of thank you cards to write
- games to play
- hang outs to happen
- last conversations to take place
- good bye hugs
- prayer times
- making memories
In 31 days I will begin World Race training camp in Georgia...
- meeting my team
- visting my lovely Macon friends
- enjoying the deep south
- eatin' some chick fil'a
In 2 months my friends Amy and DJ are getting married.
In less than 3 months I will be in Haiti starting the WORLD RACE.
WOW!
- 3 exams to write
- 1 speech to get 'formally' approved
- lots of thank you cards to write
- games to play
- hang outs to happen
- last conversations to take place
- good bye hugs
- prayer times
- making memories
In 31 days I will begin World Race training camp in Georgia...
- meeting my team
- visting my lovely Macon friends
- enjoying the deep south
- eatin' some chick fil'a
In 2 months my friends Amy and DJ are getting married.
In less than 3 months I will be in Haiti starting the WORLD RACE.
WOW!
Saturday, April 17, 2010
forgotten in the forest
I find myself at a strange crossroads...
despising the place I once loved most...
loving the people who have hurt me most...
though perhaps to despise is too harsh a term.
Detachment and release are at the forefront of my mind...
from this institution I once identified with.
Grateful for the years of instruction, friendship, and the like...
mourning the callousness of goodbyes and the ties I must admit, broke long ago.
Forgotten in the forest
I feel as I say goodbye...
Forgotten in the field
blinded by man's eyes...
Forgotten in the building
though hundreds stand near by.
Forgotten, forgotten, forgotten.
To finish with such little anticipation,
such small celebration,
such little regard, no reward, no acknowledgement.
To be a face unseen in a land where you've planted seed,
Tis' more tragic than loneliness itself.
Some things matter little in life and require much -
yet others matter much and require little or everything.
Such strange expectations,
Such peculiar boundaries,
Such unnecessary words,
Such puzzling contradictions,
Such unwanted practice...
Done.
Final.
Finished.
Successful.
Completed.
Expired.
Overdue.
Winner.
Victory.
the End.
Still Standing.
As I prepare to go...my heart races:
with questions
with answers
with dreams
with visions
with passions
with desires
with fears
with wonders
with hopes
with disappointments
with anxiousness and anticipation
with zeal and gusto
with preparedness
with adventure
with drive, motivation, encouragement
with Truth
with joy
with love
with hurt
with...
I love people - and they hurt me a lot.
I love laughter - and I cry a lot.
I love learning - and I fail a lot.
I love trying again - and I succeed a lot.
I love new seasons - and I hate saying goodbye.
The power of the tongue holdeth the ability to birth life or bring death.
May my words in the forgotten forest...
in this season of goodbye bring much light, life, joy, peace, and passion.
I find myself at a strange crossroads...
despising the place I once loved most...
loving the people who have hurt me most...
Grateful for the years of instruction, friendship, and the like...
mourning the callousness of goodbyes and the ties I must admit, broke long ago.
despising the place I once loved most...
loving the people who have hurt me most...
though perhaps to despise is too harsh a term.
Detachment and release are at the forefront of my mind...
from this institution I once identified with.
Grateful for the years of instruction, friendship, and the like...
mourning the callousness of goodbyes and the ties I must admit, broke long ago.
Forgotten in the forest
I feel as I say goodbye...
Forgotten in the field
blinded by man's eyes...
Forgotten in the building
though hundreds stand near by.
Forgotten, forgotten, forgotten.
To finish with such little anticipation,
such small celebration,
such little regard, no reward, no acknowledgement.
To be a face unseen in a land where you've planted seed,
Tis' more tragic than loneliness itself.
Some things matter little in life and require much -
yet others matter much and require little or everything.
Such strange expectations,
Such peculiar boundaries,
Such unnecessary words,
Such puzzling contradictions,
Such unwanted practice...
Done.
Final.
Finished.
Successful.
Completed.
Expired.
Overdue.
Winner.
Victory.
the End.
Still Standing.
As I prepare to go...my heart races:
with questions
with answers
with dreams
with visions
with passions
with desires
with fears
with wonders
with hopes
with disappointments
with anxiousness and anticipation
with zeal and gusto
with preparedness
with adventure
with drive, motivation, encouragement
with Truth
with joy
with love
with hurt
with...
I love people - and they hurt me a lot.
I love laughter - and I cry a lot.
I love learning - and I fail a lot.
I love trying again - and I succeed a lot.
I love new seasons - and I hate saying goodbye.
The power of the tongue holdeth the ability to birth life or bring death.
May my words in the forgotten forest...
in this season of goodbye bring much light, life, joy, peace, and passion.
I find myself at a strange crossroads...
despising the place I once loved most...
loving the people who have hurt me most...
Grateful for the years of instruction, friendship, and the like...
mourning the callousness of goodbyes and the ties I must admit, broke long ago.
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
reunions and ceremonies
All the past PLC got to meet up with Prez @ Smitty's for milkshakes and story time.
The BBC Athletic Reception - honoring all those who participate in athletics on campus!
Ministry to Adults class family - Dr. Taylor facilitated a class we all grew to love and admire this semester.
Psalm class family. As a small class we grew close, especially during our presentation times.
Sunday, April 11, 2010
1 Peter 1:13-16
"Therefore, prepare your minds for action; be self-controlled;
set your hope fully on the grace to be given you when Jesus Christ is revealed.
As obedient children,
do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance.
But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in ALL you do;
for it is written: "Be holy, because I am holy."
(1 Peter 1:13-16 NIV).
set your hope fully on the grace to be given you when Jesus Christ is revealed.
As obedient children,
do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance.
But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in ALL you do;
for it is written: "Be holy, because I am holy."
(1 Peter 1:13-16 NIV).
Thursday, April 01, 2010
maple syrup and 'womens work'
Last Saturday I piled into a vehicle with three brothers and headed an hour and a half away to a little town called Tracy. Our purpose on this bright and early morning was to serve however we were needed.
Obviously from the get go, I was quite outnumbered, and oftentimes I feel frustrated when people even suggest my capabilities, skills, or work-abilities as less than that of any man, but slowly and surely over the last two years I've been learning to both trust and mostly to RESPECT. Men need respect, and while respecting them does not necessarily mean I am not just as or more capable than them of accomplishing some hard task - it does mean that I am allowing my heart to practice submission - and to build my brothers in Christ up by setting a good example of being supportive, and believing in them to accomplish it just fine without me.
Our destination was a little place known as the "Village of Hope" which is currently under construction and will eventually be a rehabilitation center for men struggling with drug & alcohol addiction. They will reside at the facility for 10 months and work some of the industries being established on the land: wood or the maple syrup sugary.
After brief introductions with all the men I was informed not to worry, that the women would arrive shortly with pancake stuff, and perhaps I could join them in making labels. I prayed I could get outside and do some hard, tough work - which for the majority of my life has been my measure of success vs. failure. Have I worked hard and given my all, or have I just sort of done something? Momentarily bypassing the suggestion that I peel and stick labels, we all loaded in the truck and headed off to stack wood. It felt good to chop mud, ice, and wood piles to get all the good stuff vs. the stuff that needed to be thrown away and burned. The day had just begun and I already felt closer to success and good accomplishment that I had expected. We loaded and stacked some more wood, and eventually it was lunch time.
We all gladly dined on pancakes -- and fresh, homemade maple syrup with the promise in the air of heading off to the sugary after lunch. We gathered our gloves, and gear, headed to the truck and suddenly I found myself in a bit of a situation. Standing among the company of 7-8 men, I was asked to join the women inside for clean-up duty. My heart sank. "So close yet so far" I thought to myself. I responded quickly so as not to show my true feelings on my face, and in the name of "serving" I wandered back down around the house and inside to do "womens work". Now the one thing I know to be true about womens work is that it's usually easy - and I have to admit I find it a little dull, meticulous, boring, but necessary because it comes so naturally. I've been doing these tasks since I was a toddler with my mom (and dad - they shared equal responsibilities and worked as a team). This is important because as I've grown up I've always felt a great need to be challenged in order to enjoy work.
Drying dishes, I struck up a conversation that was encouraging and interesting. We picked up dishes, pots, pans, and leftover supplies. Voila we were finished and there wasn't much else to do - but you know women...we always look for something else to do...and eventually we remember its all done. We finally finished and waited a little longer til' we could head over to the sugary! I danced my way to the truck. Finally! Finally! I get to go and see maple syrup made!!!
It was in this moment that God began to work on my heart - I remembered my humiliating walk down from the wood-stacking and group of guys to 'help clean up' and I remembered how icky and hard it was to swallow my pride and agenda to serve where people wanted me to serve this particular day. It was tough - and as we drove to the sugary I started to understand the purpose of "respecting" men - supporting them - and sometimes doing the seemingly unimportant little things even when we want to do the crazy, tough things. If for one purpose, and one purpose alone I spent that time helping clean up, it was to have a conversation with a new sister in Christ - and to allow the truth to sink into my heart that [tough work does not always = good work] as well as, "whatever we do, we are to do not as though we are working for men, but for God - He deserves to be honored in all things, great and small."
Later in the afternoon - happily at the sugary watching maple syrup be made, and helping stack more wood, we dined on maple taffy, freshly made with boiled syrup poured and rolled on snow. It was dining over this taffy that spurred a conversation between both myself and one of my brothers. I shared what I'd learned about "womens work" - and laughed deep inside as he said, "oooh are you joking? I would have totally love to do that! I would have traded with you in an instant." This silly conversation brought a full perspective to my understanding and lesson - sometimes guys don't enjoy doing the "tough work" and would much rather prefer doing some "women's work".
While today was a great opportunity to learn and serve - I think sometimes we need to remember not to miss the potential before us. We need to be intentional in placing people we work with and minister to, in places where they love what they are doing, and will be willing to pour all of themselves, and their passion into accomplishing what is before them. Sometimes in doing this, we find the unthinkable, and the impossible. Sometimes it can be beautiful. Sometimes learning things is as simple as "womens work" or as complicated as making maple syrup...what we take away from it, and how we choose to respond it totally up to us.
Obviously from the get go, I was quite outnumbered, and oftentimes I feel frustrated when people even suggest my capabilities, skills, or work-abilities as less than that of any man, but slowly and surely over the last two years I've been learning to both trust and mostly to RESPECT. Men need respect, and while respecting them does not necessarily mean I am not just as or more capable than them of accomplishing some hard task - it does mean that I am allowing my heart to practice submission - and to build my brothers in Christ up by setting a good example of being supportive, and believing in them to accomplish it just fine without me.
Our destination was a little place known as the "Village of Hope" which is currently under construction and will eventually be a rehabilitation center for men struggling with drug & alcohol addiction. They will reside at the facility for 10 months and work some of the industries being established on the land: wood or the maple syrup sugary.
After brief introductions with all the men I was informed not to worry, that the women would arrive shortly with pancake stuff, and perhaps I could join them in making labels. I prayed I could get outside and do some hard, tough work - which for the majority of my life has been my measure of success vs. failure. Have I worked hard and given my all, or have I just sort of done something? Momentarily bypassing the suggestion that I peel and stick labels, we all loaded in the truck and headed off to stack wood. It felt good to chop mud, ice, and wood piles to get all the good stuff vs. the stuff that needed to be thrown away and burned. The day had just begun and I already felt closer to success and good accomplishment that I had expected. We loaded and stacked some more wood, and eventually it was lunch time.
We all gladly dined on pancakes -- and fresh, homemade maple syrup with the promise in the air of heading off to the sugary after lunch. We gathered our gloves, and gear, headed to the truck and suddenly I found myself in a bit of a situation. Standing among the company of 7-8 men, I was asked to join the women inside for clean-up duty. My heart sank. "So close yet so far" I thought to myself. I responded quickly so as not to show my true feelings on my face, and in the name of "serving" I wandered back down around the house and inside to do "womens work". Now the one thing I know to be true about womens work is that it's usually easy - and I have to admit I find it a little dull, meticulous, boring, but necessary because it comes so naturally. I've been doing these tasks since I was a toddler with my mom (and dad - they shared equal responsibilities and worked as a team). This is important because as I've grown up I've always felt a great need to be challenged in order to enjoy work.
Drying dishes, I struck up a conversation that was encouraging and interesting. We picked up dishes, pots, pans, and leftover supplies. Voila we were finished and there wasn't much else to do - but you know women...we always look for something else to do...and eventually we remember its all done. We finally finished and waited a little longer til' we could head over to the sugary! I danced my way to the truck. Finally! Finally! I get to go and see maple syrup made!!!
It was in this moment that God began to work on my heart - I remembered my humiliating walk down from the wood-stacking and group of guys to 'help clean up' and I remembered how icky and hard it was to swallow my pride and agenda to serve where people wanted me to serve this particular day. It was tough - and as we drove to the sugary I started to understand the purpose of "respecting" men - supporting them - and sometimes doing the seemingly unimportant little things even when we want to do the crazy, tough things. If for one purpose, and one purpose alone I spent that time helping clean up, it was to have a conversation with a new sister in Christ - and to allow the truth to sink into my heart that [tough work does not always = good work] as well as, "whatever we do, we are to do not as though we are working for men, but for God - He deserves to be honored in all things, great and small."
Later in the afternoon - happily at the sugary watching maple syrup be made, and helping stack more wood, we dined on maple taffy, freshly made with boiled syrup poured and rolled on snow. It was dining over this taffy that spurred a conversation between both myself and one of my brothers. I shared what I'd learned about "womens work" - and laughed deep inside as he said, "oooh are you joking? I would have totally love to do that! I would have traded with you in an instant." This silly conversation brought a full perspective to my understanding and lesson - sometimes guys don't enjoy doing the "tough work" and would much rather prefer doing some "women's work".
While today was a great opportunity to learn and serve - I think sometimes we need to remember not to miss the potential before us. We need to be intentional in placing people we work with and minister to, in places where they love what they are doing, and will be willing to pour all of themselves, and their passion into accomplishing what is before them. Sometimes in doing this, we find the unthinkable, and the impossible. Sometimes it can be beautiful. Sometimes learning things is as simple as "womens work" or as complicated as making maple syrup...what we take away from it, and how we choose to respond it totally up to us.
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
yard raking, snow shoveling, and a sweet little ol' lady named Dorreen
College is full of busy days where you catch your breath in the morning and finally let it out later that night.
Today was a day like that for me. I awoke to the beautiful sunrise - sat through a few classes and was off to the races.
Meetings, responsibilities, papers, presentations...all looming over my head + the cold I've been warring with for the last week.
I felt like I needed to walk down the hill to the library and allotted myself 15 minutes to make necessary photocopies and to be back up the hill for some serious task-accompishing.Clad in my St. Patty's day attire - a green skirt, dress blouse, and boots...I'm not quite sure what came over me, but I found myself stopping part way down the hill to speak to an older woman raking her yard. "Hello!" I offered politely attempting to saunter on my way, but my feet became like cement blocks. I wasn't going any where no matter what I tried. "Could I help you rake your lawn?" I suddenly found myself asking. The surprised on her face told me this was an uncommon occurrence for her. Seeing she was quite taken with the offer I asked if she had an extra rake. "Why dear...you don't have to do that. I'm sure you've got plenty of places to be and go. You go along dear."
Feet cemented to the sidewalk I gave the situation one final push "Oh no worries M'am. I would love to help you and no one is expecting me to be anywhere right now. Let's make this yard of yours really nice so the green grass can come out." She was convinced and offered me her rake so she could go into her shed to get another one. I quickly removed my coat and started working.Noticing an amazingly frozen heap of icy snow near the front of her yard I asked if she could bring a shovel as well. "Oh dear I don't know if that thing will ever melt" she replied. "Oh we'll get it! We'll chop it right up!" I assured her.
She returned with her shovel and an additional rake. She casually mentioned needing to find a solution for the dog poop in her yard. There were a few places where the dog had secretly left his mark and she was unaware. Like a kindergartner eager to be the line leader I found myself excitedly volunteering "I'll clean the poop...and put it in a bag. Oooh pick me". haha! In my mind this was quite a riot, but in the moment I was completely serious.
I soon found out the lady's name was Dorreen and she will be turning 80 in May. She lives a fairly simple life accompanied by her dog Buster, but loves keeping her yard clean. She complimented the neighbor across the street on the great work of their yard only to receive an encouraging reply of "you'll never get that ice mount chopped up."
Shovel full after shovel full, I chopped, I smooshed, I clanked, and scooped, and cleaned - until that ice chunky pile was nothing. My genius idea involved tossing all this ice and snow into the road, which proved to work in some ways as it melted it super fast. It distracted a few drivers who slowed down to laugh or smile at us working. An hour + 1/2 later I found myself hugging Dorreen as she slipped $10 in my hand and admiring a clean yard practically cleansed of all winter's markings.
My point in sharing this story is in no way to say that I am some how amazing. My motive is this - to remind us all how even in the midst of busy, hard to breathe times, that God still deserves to be and should be King of our time - completely in charge. I didn't intend on stopping on my way down the hill - and who knows how many times in the past I've passed by opportunities to show the excellence and love of Christ - for the sake of meeting some deadline, expectation, or to-do list. People like Mrs. Dorreen exist in all neighborhoods, and while I had no time for anything outside of meetings, etc. today, God somehow made time for me to spend 1 1/2 hours cleaning this lady's yard. In all honestly, it was the highlight and most useful thing I did all day. I wouldn't have traded that time for any other.
One thing that really stood out to me came through something Dorreen spoke to me toward the end of our adventurous project. As I scooped shovel full of ice, after shovel full of ice into the roadway from around her flower beds she asked me, "Dear, why don't you just quit? Why are you working so hard?" One word ran through my head in this moment, "Excellence". Christ call us to be excellent in all we do - and to liken the work we do for others unto work we are truly doing for the glory of God.
Yard raking, ice chopping, and a sweet ol' lady named Dorreen are enough to significantly alter one's plans and agendas in such a way that you can't imagine what would have happened if you didn't stop...I dare y'all to stop today and let God control your time.
Today was a day like that for me. I awoke to the beautiful sunrise - sat through a few classes and was off to the races.
Meetings, responsibilities, papers, presentations...all looming over my head + the cold I've been warring with for the last week.
I felt like I needed to walk down the hill to the library and allotted myself 15 minutes to make necessary photocopies and to be back up the hill for some serious task-accompishing.Clad in my St. Patty's day attire - a green skirt, dress blouse, and boots...I'm not quite sure what came over me, but I found myself stopping part way down the hill to speak to an older woman raking her yard. "Hello!" I offered politely attempting to saunter on my way, but my feet became like cement blocks. I wasn't going any where no matter what I tried. "Could I help you rake your lawn?" I suddenly found myself asking. The surprised on her face told me this was an uncommon occurrence for her. Seeing she was quite taken with the offer I asked if she had an extra rake. "Why dear...you don't have to do that. I'm sure you've got plenty of places to be and go. You go along dear."
Feet cemented to the sidewalk I gave the situation one final push "Oh no worries M'am. I would love to help you and no one is expecting me to be anywhere right now. Let's make this yard of yours really nice so the green grass can come out." She was convinced and offered me her rake so she could go into her shed to get another one. I quickly removed my coat and started working.Noticing an amazingly frozen heap of icy snow near the front of her yard I asked if she could bring a shovel as well. "Oh dear I don't know if that thing will ever melt" she replied. "Oh we'll get it! We'll chop it right up!" I assured her.
She returned with her shovel and an additional rake. She casually mentioned needing to find a solution for the dog poop in her yard. There were a few places where the dog had secretly left his mark and she was unaware. Like a kindergartner eager to be the line leader I found myself excitedly volunteering "I'll clean the poop...and put it in a bag. Oooh pick me". haha! In my mind this was quite a riot, but in the moment I was completely serious.
I soon found out the lady's name was Dorreen and she will be turning 80 in May. She lives a fairly simple life accompanied by her dog Buster, but loves keeping her yard clean. She complimented the neighbor across the street on the great work of their yard only to receive an encouraging reply of "you'll never get that ice mount chopped up."
Shovel full after shovel full, I chopped, I smooshed, I clanked, and scooped, and cleaned - until that ice chunky pile was nothing. My genius idea involved tossing all this ice and snow into the road, which proved to work in some ways as it melted it super fast. It distracted a few drivers who slowed down to laugh or smile at us working. An hour + 1/2 later I found myself hugging Dorreen as she slipped $10 in my hand and admiring a clean yard practically cleansed of all winter's markings.
My point in sharing this story is in no way to say that I am some how amazing. My motive is this - to remind us all how even in the midst of busy, hard to breathe times, that God still deserves to be and should be King of our time - completely in charge. I didn't intend on stopping on my way down the hill - and who knows how many times in the past I've passed by opportunities to show the excellence and love of Christ - for the sake of meeting some deadline, expectation, or to-do list. People like Mrs. Dorreen exist in all neighborhoods, and while I had no time for anything outside of meetings, etc. today, God somehow made time for me to spend 1 1/2 hours cleaning this lady's yard. In all honestly, it was the highlight and most useful thing I did all day. I wouldn't have traded that time for any other.
One thing that really stood out to me came through something Dorreen spoke to me toward the end of our adventurous project. As I scooped shovel full of ice, after shovel full of ice into the roadway from around her flower beds she asked me, "Dear, why don't you just quit? Why are you working so hard?" One word ran through my head in this moment, "Excellence". Christ call us to be excellent in all we do - and to liken the work we do for others unto work we are truly doing for the glory of God.
Yard raking, ice chopping, and a sweet ol' lady named Dorreen are enough to significantly alter one's plans and agendas in such a way that you can't imagine what would have happened if you didn't stop...I dare y'all to stop today and let God control your time.
Monday, March 08, 2010
good gifts
I love finding random scribblings here and there amongst notebooks, my Bible, pads of paper I never went back to writing in since the last time some profound thought came about. I first of all want to encourage you when you have revelations or thoughts to write them down - when God does a work in your heart write it down - write your journey - record it. It's always a beautiful thing to look back over where you've been, to think about where you're going and to track how you've gotten there.
Tonight I found a paper with some encouraging words I wanted to share with you my faithful blog readers:
Have you ever had a moment where you said to yourself, "this is what I thought ---" or "this is what I wanted ---" BUT GOD... "did this" or "sent me here", etc? I had a good friend tell me once that God gives good gifts even in the midst of disappointments.
It seems like we spend our lives in the crazy circle of "I ---> which leads to BUT God..." Realizing it or not - the but God part is always the best part - because it always offers us an opportunity to partake of the plan He has for us and our lives. It's a place of fullness that is sometimes painful, but after the stripping away, the real beauty can be seen.
You may have certain agendas, plans, aspirations, dreams, or even relationship that don't truly fit you - they're practically like wearing a 3x shirt when you should really wear a M or a size Small when you're shaped for a large --- BUT God loves you, so allow Him to direct you --- allow yourself to see the good gifts, the blessings even in times of seeming disappointment!
Tonight I found a paper with some encouraging words I wanted to share with you my faithful blog readers:
Have you ever had a moment where you said to yourself, "this is what I thought ---" or "this is what I wanted ---" BUT GOD... "did this" or "sent me here", etc? I had a good friend tell me once that God gives good gifts even in the midst of disappointments.
It seems like we spend our lives in the crazy circle of "I ---> which leads to BUT God..." Realizing it or not - the but God part is always the best part - because it always offers us an opportunity to partake of the plan He has for us and our lives. It's a place of fullness that is sometimes painful, but after the stripping away, the real beauty can be seen.
You may have certain agendas, plans, aspirations, dreams, or even relationship that don't truly fit you - they're practically like wearing a 3x shirt when you should really wear a M or a size Small when you're shaped for a large --- BUT God loves you, so allow Him to direct you --- allow yourself to see the good gifts, the blessings even in times of seeming disappointment!
Friday, March 05, 2010
dance, dance, dance
"Dance" by David Crowder Band
This song encourages me with the simple truth in it's lyrics and motivation to just DANCE --- to praise the Lord --- to be perfectly FREE!!!
This song encourages me with the simple truth in it's lyrics and motivation to just DANCE --- to praise the Lord --- to be perfectly FREE!!!
Thursday, February 25, 2010
the pesky little tick
Walking through a dead, grassy field today, I found myself reminded of the season I spent in Georgia. "Christy...you're in Canada now...there are not ticks or snakes under these piles of brush." Spending most of my growing up years in Northern Maine, I was used to free, mostly clean and critter-free woods. Working at an outdoor day camp in the middle of a humid Georgia summer changed forever my perspective on walking in the woods. I could no longer stroll, eyes to the sky, just wandering wherever my feet took me. I had to be alert, intentional, deliberate. Danger, icky bugs, and poisonous plans lurked around every corner. Poison ivy, poison oak, poison spiders...The only question I found myself asking time and time again in the woods was..."what can I step on?"
One critter in particular which I was not over fond of was the 'tick'.
People talk about ticks and you think nothing of them until they're on you.
The worst part about a tick is that you don't always recognize its presence right away.
A tick can jump, leap or cling to you at a moment's notice and until you realize it, you're stuck with the consequences - which if not treated in a timely manner can lead to sickness and perhaps death.
The first time I heard tell of these sickening little creatures we were on a nature walk with a group of counselors - doing prep work and exploring the trails we would be taking campers on for the remainder of the summer. Our leader convinced me that as long as I sprayed just my feet and ankles with bug spray, the ticks would stay away. I believe him...until people started finding "super ticks" on their shoulders...faces...heads...and backs. ICK! How did those get there? I thought we'd prepared and cleaned ourselves up enough that we couldn't be touched! Nevertheless, the ticks found a way. I was no longer convinced that merely covering over one area of myself would prevent tick encounters.
I became obsessed with checking myself for ticks...and had at least a dozen encounters. Thankfully, none of them ever embedded in me deep enough to need medical attention. What's the scariest part about having an encounter with a pesky little tick? Well, the first part we've already explored - you don't always recognize it's there. The second and perhaps more important aspect is that once you do recognize its presence, it doesn't leave easily. A simple sweep of the hand does nothing but raise one's anxiety level in realizing this little sucker is literally stuck to them.
Hitting, patting, scrapping...none of this will remove the tick...and if the slight possibility of it actually working does occur...the tick usually quickly attached itself to the finger, hand, etc. which was sweeping it away. This doesn't make the situation any better. To remove a tick, one must squeeze the surface of the skin and pull the tick away from the skin. Sometimes we don't catch these surface dwelling ticks and they somehow bore their way beneath our skin - this requires some serious digging on behalf of a medical professional.
So why all this elaborate talk about ticks? I was reminded in the field today that ticks are sort of like the sin in our lives. Sometimes we're just walking along, uncovered, unprepared, unknowledgeable about what's around us, unfamiliar with the woods which we seek to explore - and we believe what others tell us in terms of "getting by" or "making things right". Much like ticks, sin attaches itself to our lives in such a way that we don't always notice it right away. If we leave it long enough that area of our lives will likely swell, rage with infection, and make us absolutely sick. The tick, or sin will become so engorged we won't be able to fathom how it ever got rooted beneath our skin in the first place.
Another aspect of this I realized is that sin is never easily swept off the surface - it fights, it clings, it burrows, and if we try to approach it with the naive belief that we can somehow sweep it away, it will undoubtedly attach itself somewhere else - likely the nearest exposed area it sees. Getting rid of ticks can be painful and hard work...it can be frustrating and hurtful and sometimes seem not worth the work it requires - but it's necessary. Not dealing with it will lead to rotting flesh. We need to approach the sin areas of our lives with intention, a deliberateness that is willing to pinch however hard it takes to squeeze the rotting goop out of us.
Sometimes the sin our our lives...much like an engorged tick, is so deeply rooted, that it requires the assistance of a "medical professional" or a brother/sister in Christ to support us in the situation. Christ created the "body", the "church" because we are relational people - and we need one another to function, to thrive. We are called to love and serve one another in such a way that we reflect the heart of the Kingdom, the Father's heart. "Where two or more are gathered, He is in their midst" (Matthew 18:20).
With all this said, I feel as though I need to make one final thing clear - just because ticks are around and the risk of them attaching to our lives is available daily - does not mean we are to walk around living in fear of these ticks...of sin. We need to walk boldly and confidently by the power of Christ in us, as the Bible instructs us - not in fear. When we accept Christ as our Savior, the old man is gone and we are given a new nature, created to be like Christ Jesus. This doesn't mean that "ticks" no longer exist, just that we walk with greater awareness and preparedness when we know they are around.
As Christians, we also become more accustomed and consistent in "checking ourselves" before the Lord to see if there is any sinfulness in our hearts or lives. Checking and examining oneself is vital to our spiritual health and growth, as well as uncovering those pecky little 'ticks' we didn't realize took up residence on the surface/under our skin!
One critter in particular which I was not over fond of was the 'tick'.
People talk about ticks and you think nothing of them until they're on you.
The worst part about a tick is that you don't always recognize its presence right away.
A tick can jump, leap or cling to you at a moment's notice and until you realize it, you're stuck with the consequences - which if not treated in a timely manner can lead to sickness and perhaps death.
The first time I heard tell of these sickening little creatures we were on a nature walk with a group of counselors - doing prep work and exploring the trails we would be taking campers on for the remainder of the summer. Our leader convinced me that as long as I sprayed just my feet and ankles with bug spray, the ticks would stay away. I believe him...until people started finding "super ticks" on their shoulders...faces...heads...and backs. ICK! How did those get there? I thought we'd prepared and cleaned ourselves up enough that we couldn't be touched! Nevertheless, the ticks found a way. I was no longer convinced that merely covering over one area of myself would prevent tick encounters.
I became obsessed with checking myself for ticks...and had at least a dozen encounters. Thankfully, none of them ever embedded in me deep enough to need medical attention. What's the scariest part about having an encounter with a pesky little tick? Well, the first part we've already explored - you don't always recognize it's there. The second and perhaps more important aspect is that once you do recognize its presence, it doesn't leave easily. A simple sweep of the hand does nothing but raise one's anxiety level in realizing this little sucker is literally stuck to them.
Hitting, patting, scrapping...none of this will remove the tick...and if the slight possibility of it actually working does occur...the tick usually quickly attached itself to the finger, hand, etc. which was sweeping it away. This doesn't make the situation any better. To remove a tick, one must squeeze the surface of the skin and pull the tick away from the skin. Sometimes we don't catch these surface dwelling ticks and they somehow bore their way beneath our skin - this requires some serious digging on behalf of a medical professional.
So why all this elaborate talk about ticks? I was reminded in the field today that ticks are sort of like the sin in our lives. Sometimes we're just walking along, uncovered, unprepared, unknowledgeable about what's around us, unfamiliar with the woods which we seek to explore - and we believe what others tell us in terms of "getting by" or "making things right". Much like ticks, sin attaches itself to our lives in such a way that we don't always notice it right away. If we leave it long enough that area of our lives will likely swell, rage with infection, and make us absolutely sick. The tick, or sin will become so engorged we won't be able to fathom how it ever got rooted beneath our skin in the first place.
Another aspect of this I realized is that sin is never easily swept off the surface - it fights, it clings, it burrows, and if we try to approach it with the naive belief that we can somehow sweep it away, it will undoubtedly attach itself somewhere else - likely the nearest exposed area it sees. Getting rid of ticks can be painful and hard work...it can be frustrating and hurtful and sometimes seem not worth the work it requires - but it's necessary. Not dealing with it will lead to rotting flesh. We need to approach the sin areas of our lives with intention, a deliberateness that is willing to pinch however hard it takes to squeeze the rotting goop out of us.
Sometimes the sin our our lives...much like an engorged tick, is so deeply rooted, that it requires the assistance of a "medical professional" or a brother/sister in Christ to support us in the situation. Christ created the "body", the "church" because we are relational people - and we need one another to function, to thrive. We are called to love and serve one another in such a way that we reflect the heart of the Kingdom, the Father's heart. "Where two or more are gathered, He is in their midst" (Matthew 18:20).
With all this said, I feel as though I need to make one final thing clear - just because ticks are around and the risk of them attaching to our lives is available daily - does not mean we are to walk around living in fear of these ticks...of sin. We need to walk boldly and confidently by the power of Christ in us, as the Bible instructs us - not in fear. When we accept Christ as our Savior, the old man is gone and we are given a new nature, created to be like Christ Jesus. This doesn't mean that "ticks" no longer exist, just that we walk with greater awareness and preparedness when we know they are around.
As Christians, we also become more accustomed and consistent in "checking ourselves" before the Lord to see if there is any sinfulness in our hearts or lives. Checking and examining oneself is vital to our spiritual health and growth, as well as uncovering those pecky little 'ticks' we didn't realize took up residence on the surface/under our skin!
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
fading
Fading slowly, fading fast.
Freedom, freedom, here at last.
Fading slowly, fading fast.
Freedom, freedom such a blast.
But wait...
Just one moment...
an unexpected turn...
just waiting now to crash and burn.
Breathe in.
Breathe deep.
The ship's begun to sink...
overboard you go...to the depths below.
Fading slowly, fading fast.
Why does the freedom never last?
Regrets and failures plague the mind,
Rotting a person from deep inside.
Expectations run rampant, yet the heart remains vacant...
Fading slowly, fading fast.
Thousands of questions long to know why
Why, oh why, do I ever try?
Inadequate, worthless, lonely, and still...
You lovingly hold me and calm the greatest chills.
God my God, why must this torrent rage?
Can I truly weather the storm?
Or will I fail in shame?
Purpose and process...
My heartbeat at last.
Wonder when someone will just think to ask.
How are you? Where are you?
Can I know you a bit more?
Oh friend, dear friend, we have much in store.
Created for relationship, yet alone in a crowd.
Heart full of love covered in a cloud.
Light and darkness fighting ever so hard...
to determine whose side you shall walk upon.
Aching, breaking, crying and still...
Mended, yes mended, Your Word in me stills...
the greatest of pains in this strange heart of mine...
the deepest of wounds that once chained me like a vine...
the driest of seasons where my thirst could not be quenched...
the place in my soul that so often felt wrenched.
Restore, restore...quickly Lord come!
The fountain is waiting...Your life water and blood.
Teach me Your ways, that I might know and do...
No longer fading...but rather made new.
Freedom, freedom, here at last.
Fading slowly, fading fast.
Freedom, freedom such a blast.
But wait...
Just one moment...
an unexpected turn...
just waiting now to crash and burn.
Breathe in.
Breathe deep.
The ship's begun to sink...
overboard you go...to the depths below.
Fading slowly, fading fast.
Why does the freedom never last?
Regrets and failures plague the mind,
Rotting a person from deep inside.
Expectations run rampant, yet the heart remains vacant...
Fading slowly, fading fast.
Thousands of questions long to know why
Why, oh why, do I ever try?
Inadequate, worthless, lonely, and still...
You lovingly hold me and calm the greatest chills.
God my God, why must this torrent rage?
Can I truly weather the storm?
Or will I fail in shame?
Purpose and process...
My heartbeat at last.
Wonder when someone will just think to ask.
How are you? Where are you?
Can I know you a bit more?
Oh friend, dear friend, we have much in store.
Created for relationship, yet alone in a crowd.
Heart full of love covered in a cloud.
Light and darkness fighting ever so hard...
to determine whose side you shall walk upon.
Aching, breaking, crying and still...
Mended, yes mended, Your Word in me stills...
the greatest of pains in this strange heart of mine...
the deepest of wounds that once chained me like a vine...
the driest of seasons where my thirst could not be quenched...
the place in my soul that so often felt wrenched.
Restore, restore...quickly Lord come!
The fountain is waiting...Your life water and blood.
Teach me Your ways, that I might know and do...
No longer fading...but rather made new.
Saturday, February 20, 2010
senior class
Here's a semi-complete photo of the senior class at Bethany Bible College.
A handful of us are graduating this May, while the rest of this rowdy crew is
heading out all around the world on their 5-6 month internships!
A handful of us are graduating this May, while the rest of this rowdy crew is
heading out all around the world on their 5-6 month internships!
Sunday, February 07, 2010
go go going
Ever stop to catch your breath?
Ever stop to breathe in deep?
Ever stop to seek?
Ever stop to see the unseen?
Ever stop to care?
Ever stop to consider or think?
Ever stop to dare?
Go go going, it never seems to stop.
Go go going, creates a messy slop.
Go go going is not always the best.
Go go going, eliminates one's rest.
How do we rest?
How do we work hard?
How do we balance without going crazy?
How to we achieve without being lazy or obscene?
How do we seek and think and rest and be...in the midst of a culture that demands:
Go go going...
Ever stop to breathe in deep?
Ever stop to seek?
Ever stop to see the unseen?
Ever stop to care?
Ever stop to consider or think?
Ever stop to dare?
Go go going, it never seems to stop.
Go go going, creates a messy slop.
Go go going is not always the best.
Go go going, eliminates one's rest.
How do we rest?
How do we work hard?
How do we balance without going crazy?
How to we achieve without being lazy or obscene?
How do we seek and think and rest and be...in the midst of a culture that demands:
Go go going...
Wednesday, February 03, 2010
curling...
Recently I learned how to curl.
I guess I can officially say Canada is my "half home native land".
We go every Friday at school during lunchtime.
I've been twice so far, and it is a blast!!!
Shortly before this picture was taken, my team won 2-0! :)
I guess I can officially say Canada is my "half home native land".
We go every Friday at school during lunchtime.
I've been twice so far, and it is a blast!!!
Shortly before this picture was taken, my team won 2-0! :)
night of worship
Last Saturday (January 30th) I had the privilege, along with my wonderful teammates (Eli, Dan, Andrew, Kaylie & Shane) of leading worship at the University of Maine at Presque Isle: UMPI. Transformations Ministries has had the vision recently of beginning a worship movement in our local area - encouraging the community to connect together, to unite as the body of Christ in worship - to spread the fire of the Holy Spirit and to see revival birthed in the North.
Saturday was the first ever Night of Worship also known as N.O.W. It was a blessing to be in the presence of the Lord and humbling to lead worship. Certain points were a battle and I struggled with my voice, but after having my throat anointed and being prayed with by the prayer team, a new boldness came over me, and we worshiped with every last ounce of energy, breath, and joy we had. I was blown away by the hearts of my teammates, selflessly pouring out their time, energy, and gifts into being a part of this night. Watching the Holy Spirit move in their hearts blessed me beyond what mere words can begin to describe - and having the Lord do a healing, cleansing work in my own heart was sweet as well.
There were moments of breakthrough during the night of worship, and I truly believe God was doing work in hearts beyond what we heard about or were able to see. I believe seeds were planted, healing work was done, restoration begun, and purpose discovered. I believe people had a love encounter with the Love of God, and will never view worship the same. I say this, not because of anything that I have done, but simply because it amazes me how when we ask the Lord to use us - how creatively, intricately, intentionally plugs us into just the right places, for such a time as this to serve Him - to advance His Kingdom - to reveal His glory!
My team will be leading a few more times this spring - so continue to pray that God will awaken our local area, and the hearts of university students to come and meet with Him - to discover the life-altering, plan disturbing Love of God - true Love - real Love - cleansing, healing, restoring, peace and joy unspeakable!
The lyrics to one of our songs have particularly struck me these last few weeks - they are from a song "To the Service":
"We will worship, like it's the last time we will...and we will worship, like it's the last time we will..."
If we gave all of ourselves to God - all the time - how much different would everyday life be? If our worship was not merely lip service - but a sacrifice of daily love? What if we knew we would never have another chance to worship God? How intense and intentional would we be that last time? It should be that way every time!
Saturday was the first ever Night of Worship also known as N.O.W. It was a blessing to be in the presence of the Lord and humbling to lead worship. Certain points were a battle and I struggled with my voice, but after having my throat anointed and being prayed with by the prayer team, a new boldness came over me, and we worshiped with every last ounce of energy, breath, and joy we had. I was blown away by the hearts of my teammates, selflessly pouring out their time, energy, and gifts into being a part of this night. Watching the Holy Spirit move in their hearts blessed me beyond what mere words can begin to describe - and having the Lord do a healing, cleansing work in my own heart was sweet as well.
There were moments of breakthrough during the night of worship, and I truly believe God was doing work in hearts beyond what we heard about or were able to see. I believe seeds were planted, healing work was done, restoration begun, and purpose discovered. I believe people had a love encounter with the Love of God, and will never view worship the same. I say this, not because of anything that I have done, but simply because it amazes me how when we ask the Lord to use us - how creatively, intricately, intentionally plugs us into just the right places, for such a time as this to serve Him - to advance His Kingdom - to reveal His glory!
My team will be leading a few more times this spring - so continue to pray that God will awaken our local area, and the hearts of university students to come and meet with Him - to discover the life-altering, plan disturbing Love of God - true Love - real Love - cleansing, healing, restoring, peace and joy unspeakable!
The lyrics to one of our songs have particularly struck me these last few weeks - they are from a song "To the Service":
"We will worship, like it's the last time we will...and we will worship, like it's the last time we will..."
If we gave all of ourselves to God - all the time - how much different would everyday life be? If our worship was not merely lip service - but a sacrifice of daily love? What if we knew we would never have another chance to worship God? How intense and intentional would we be that last time? It should be that way every time!
Thursday, January 28, 2010
world race update
I was asked by someone to explain what I am preparing to do on the World Race and what I expect/believe I will bring to it. Here are some thoughts:
"Ever since I was a little girl, I've felt called to love people.During my time here at Bethany God has stretched, kneaded, and grown my heart with a passion for the nations overseas. With Christian Counseling at the core of my studies, I hope to one day offer healing, and restoration services by the power of the Holy Spirit, to men and women hurting and chained overseas as a result of the sex trade. I discovered the World Race during my internship and it is my heart's desire to serve in this endeavor with all that I am. The basic premise of the World Race involves ministering for 11 months in 11 different countries. Starting this July, for the next year of my life, I will be living completely out of a backpack - sleeping in a tent or hostel with 6-7 teammates - living among the native people of various lands, and loving them at the point of their need in Jesus' name. My July 2010 team will be working with issues such as AIDS education, orphan outreach, human-trafficking, and gypsy outreach. I view this adventure as somewhat of a "mission buffet" through which the Lord is preparing to expose my heart to a variety of people groups, in a variety of conditions, cultures and circumstances, to LOVE until it hurts and to keep on loving. I believe my heart is going to be forever changed as I see the love of Christ permeate through language barriers, living conditions, and seemingly hopeless, dark places. I believe God is raising up an army of worshipers in my generation, awakening people to run to the battlefield - and in losing our lives to Him in worship - to truly find LIFE!"
A few extra details:
-So far I have 27% of my support raised (roughly $4,000 of $15,000 needed - this covers ALL expenses - travel, insurance, visas, etc.)
-We currently know 6/11 countries - as the July route is a mystery route. We've been given clues from time to time to research in order to discover what country we will be serving in.
1) The Dominican Republic (July)
2) Haiti (August)
3) Mozambique
4) Cambodia
5) Romania
6) Turkey
+ 5 others yet to be determined!
*For more information check out: http://christyzbylut.theworldrace.org or http://theworldrace.org.
"Ever since I was a little girl, I've felt called to love people.During my time here at Bethany God has stretched, kneaded, and grown my heart with a passion for the nations overseas. With Christian Counseling at the core of my studies, I hope to one day offer healing, and restoration services by the power of the Holy Spirit, to men and women hurting and chained overseas as a result of the sex trade. I discovered the World Race during my internship and it is my heart's desire to serve in this endeavor with all that I am. The basic premise of the World Race involves ministering for 11 months in 11 different countries. Starting this July, for the next year of my life, I will be living completely out of a backpack - sleeping in a tent or hostel with 6-7 teammates - living among the native people of various lands, and loving them at the point of their need in Jesus' name. My July 2010 team will be working with issues such as AIDS education, orphan outreach, human-trafficking, and gypsy outreach. I view this adventure as somewhat of a "mission buffet" through which the Lord is preparing to expose my heart to a variety of people groups, in a variety of conditions, cultures and circumstances, to LOVE until it hurts and to keep on loving. I believe my heart is going to be forever changed as I see the love of Christ permeate through language barriers, living conditions, and seemingly hopeless, dark places. I believe God is raising up an army of worshipers in my generation, awakening people to run to the battlefield - and in losing our lives to Him in worship - to truly find LIFE!"
A few extra details:
-So far I have 27% of my support raised (roughly $4,000 of $15,000 needed - this covers ALL expenses - travel, insurance, visas, etc.)
-We currently know 6/11 countries - as the July route is a mystery route. We've been given clues from time to time to research in order to discover what country we will be serving in.
1) The Dominican Republic (July)
2) Haiti (August)
3) Mozambique
4) Cambodia
5) Romania
6) Turkey
+ 5 others yet to be determined!
*For more information check out: http://christyzbylut.theworldrace.org or http://theworldrace.org.
a few recent happenings
Night skiing with the family at Big Rock!
Visiting Prince Edward Island and my roommate Sarah!
We made a short & chilly stop at Cavendish Beach.
Visiting Prince Edward Island and my roommate Sarah!
We made a short & chilly stop at Cavendish Beach.
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
why I'm going...
Today I happened upon the video God broke my heart with in calling me to the World Race.
I searched and searched in days following my application for the July 2010 race, and now several months later...I found it:
Bless the Lord!
These issues are part of my heart's passion and desire to fight for...the rest of my life.
I searched and searched in days following my application for the July 2010 race, and now several months later...I found it:
Bless the Lord!
These issues are part of my heart's passion and desire to fight for...the rest of my life.
Monday, January 18, 2010
preparing to worship
Worship has been at the forefront of my mind for the last season of time.
Opportunities to praise the Lord and "Bless the Lord at all times" have not been limited - that's for sure.
Each day the mercies of the Lord are new, and He deserves our praise - regardless of our circumstances, feelings, or opinions.
He is always worthy.
I think sometimes that's a difficult concept to grab ahold of and actually implement in our lives.
Surprisingly enough, worship is not just getting together to sing a bunch of songs - worship is to be a LIFESTYLE.
Our worship is to be a part of every breath, glance, thought, movement, and choice throughout our day.
Hum....that's a bit scary. That would mean that when my glances, thoughts, movements, or choices aren't to the glory of God, or offered as a sacrifice of worship to Him -- perhaps sometimes they are tainted? defiled? broken? tattered? downright ugly? bruised? not the best of the best I have to give?
God is a jealous Lover - and His demand is not a portion of our hearts, nor even an element. Rather - His desire is for the whole. C.S. Lewis wrote in his book A Plain Account of Christian Perfection that "it is an absolutely impossibility to be half Christian, for the call and even definition of a true Christian is to be ALL devoted to God, to give Him all my soul, my body, and my substance." Yes, that means everything, even the things that hurt, or we love more than anything else - He wants it all - He wants us all: body, soul, and substance. Wow!
With many 'worship opportunities' on the horizon (and I even hesitate to call them that, because it is my greatest desire that my life flow out of worship to my King, my Lover, my Savior, the One to whom all praise is due) --- In the midst of this season I find myself asking a lot of questions - and really discovering the true power and drive behind my voice and craving to exalt the Lord through music, dance, speaking, teaching, and even laughing. Yes, laughter can be an offering of worship. Why not? "The JOY of the Lord is my strength!" and "He has made me glad! Rejoice!"
Tonight I found a thought that both affirmed some things I have felt led to do in this season of preparation, and also challenged me like a two-by-four in the knee caps, for the sheer temptation to feel shame for not acting on these motivations sooner. The thought, from The Upward Call explains our preparation for worship like this: " The failure to prepare heart and mind and body for worship is to render oneself tone deaf to the things of the Spirit". I have to admit, that one stung a little...but I feel encouraged to press on.
To close these brief thoughts on worship and being wholly prepared to go before the Lord. One of my brothers Elijah shared this song with me a few weeks ago and it has tugged at something in the depths of my heart. God bless!
Opportunities to praise the Lord and "Bless the Lord at all times" have not been limited - that's for sure.
Each day the mercies of the Lord are new, and He deserves our praise - regardless of our circumstances, feelings, or opinions.
He is always worthy.
I think sometimes that's a difficult concept to grab ahold of and actually implement in our lives.
Surprisingly enough, worship is not just getting together to sing a bunch of songs - worship is to be a LIFESTYLE.
Our worship is to be a part of every breath, glance, thought, movement, and choice throughout our day.
Hum....that's a bit scary. That would mean that when my glances, thoughts, movements, or choices aren't to the glory of God, or offered as a sacrifice of worship to Him -- perhaps sometimes they are tainted? defiled? broken? tattered? downright ugly? bruised? not the best of the best I have to give?
God is a jealous Lover - and His demand is not a portion of our hearts, nor even an element. Rather - His desire is for the whole. C.S. Lewis wrote in his book A Plain Account of Christian Perfection that "it is an absolutely impossibility to be half Christian, for the call and even definition of a true Christian is to be ALL devoted to God, to give Him all my soul, my body, and my substance." Yes, that means everything, even the things that hurt, or we love more than anything else - He wants it all - He wants us all: body, soul, and substance. Wow!
With many 'worship opportunities' on the horizon (and I even hesitate to call them that, because it is my greatest desire that my life flow out of worship to my King, my Lover, my Savior, the One to whom all praise is due) --- In the midst of this season I find myself asking a lot of questions - and really discovering the true power and drive behind my voice and craving to exalt the Lord through music, dance, speaking, teaching, and even laughing. Yes, laughter can be an offering of worship. Why not? "The JOY of the Lord is my strength!" and "He has made me glad! Rejoice!"
Tonight I found a thought that both affirmed some things I have felt led to do in this season of preparation, and also challenged me like a two-by-four in the knee caps, for the sheer temptation to feel shame for not acting on these motivations sooner. The thought, from The Upward Call explains our preparation for worship like this: " The failure to prepare heart and mind and body for worship is to render oneself tone deaf to the things of the Spirit". I have to admit, that one stung a little...but I feel encouraged to press on.
To close these brief thoughts on worship and being wholly prepared to go before the Lord. One of my brothers Elijah shared this song with me a few weeks ago and it has tugged at something in the depths of my heart. God bless!
Wednesday, January 06, 2010
silent company
Adventuring through old journals always brings about the inevitable discovery of old thoughts, ponderings, and findings. Here's one from my freshman year of college journal:
"To be silent with another person is a deep expression of trust & confidence and it is only when we are uncomfortable that we feel compelled to talk. To be silent with another person is truly to be with that other person." -John Main
"To be silent with another person is a deep expression of trust & confidence and it is only when we are uncomfortable that we feel compelled to talk. To be silent with another person is truly to be with that other person." -John Main
Sunday, January 03, 2010
"I Surrender" by: Kim Walker
This video so speaks to where my heart is right now:
There is no love, sweeter than the love You pour on me.
There is no song, sweeter than the song You sing to me.
There is no place, that I would rather be,
Than here at Your feet, laying down everything.
All to You, I surrender,
Everything, every part of me.
All to You, I surrender,
All of my dreams, all of me.
If worship's like perfume, I'll pour mine out on You.
For there is none as deserving of my love like You.
So take my hand and draw me into You,
I want to be swept away, lost in love for You.
I surrender...
No turning back, I've made up my mind,
I'm giving all of my life this time.
Your love makes it worth it,
Your love makes it worth it all,
Your love makes it worth it all.
There is no love, sweeter than the love You pour on me.
There is no song, sweeter than the song You sing to me.
There is no place, that I would rather be,
Than here at Your feet, laying down everything.
All to You, I surrender,
Everything, every part of me.
All to You, I surrender,
All of my dreams, all of me.
If worship's like perfume, I'll pour mine out on You.
For there is none as deserving of my love like You.
So take my hand and draw me into You,
I want to be swept away, lost in love for You.
I surrender...
No turning back, I've made up my mind,
I'm giving all of my life this time.
Your love makes it worth it,
Your love makes it worth it all,
Your love makes it worth it all.
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